I Want To Be Single - But With You

Okay, so this post is in no way shape or from related to anything from my Writers Craft course. However I found a thing forty-two minutes ago (it is 10:42PM at the time of writing) and I feel like sharing, because after all this is a blog gosh darn it. To hell with conformity.... most of the time.

So you may be pondering; "What on god's green earth could he possibly be so gosh darned excited about.... also how excited could he possibly." Well this should somewhat explain the latter.

As for the main question; it revolves around an essay I recently heard about in an article from Psychology Today magazine. The article by Bella DePaulo (Ph.D), was discussing an essay from the Huffington Post entitled "I Want To Be Single -- But With You". The essay itself discusses (presumably from the author's point of view) the desire to be close to someone as if they were in a full-on relationship with them (i.e: affection, mutual empathy, a sense of love and security, loyalty.... sex, etc). while still being able to go about their life simultaneously as if they were single. With no commitments or obligations to the other person (i.e: bringing them with you all the time, have to work around there schedule, etc.)

The article by Dr.DePaulo proceeds to talk about the Psychology behind this, and seeing as how I cannot do it real justice, I would entreat you to read both pieces (in the order of PT article, then the essay itself) as I found them both very intriguing.

What I really want to discuss though, is the article itself, and the idea that it discusses. I'm sure there will be people who are going to be very quick to assume that this is simply some more moderate version of polygamy, I would ask you hold judgement and be willing to look a little deeper at what is being talked about.

Now the author Isabelle Tessier's idea is not that, you have one person you go to for comfort, and just do whatever the hell you'd like with other members of your prefer sex. What Ms.Tessier is trying to talk about is having that primary person that you have a connection with, enjoy spending time and can find solace in, while at the same time not being (to put it bluntly) restricted like you would normally be in a standard relation ship. Due to the fact that you continue leading a single life. To spin an old saying, "You can look at the stuff at the fruit at the market.... but you can also inquire about, touch it, taste it, buy a bunch of them," it is entirely up to you.

What love the most about this philosophy (or lifestyle if that is a better term), is that it's not just about being in an open relationship, for the sake of having numerous sexual partners, as a matter of fact the author never once talk about their fictional partner engaging in relations with someone else (though it could be argued that it would be expected). It's more about being able to fulfill our needs in way that mutually benefit both people involved. Under this idea, people would be able to have the benefits of a relationship; a source of affection, someone to talk to, someone to experience life with, someone who "gets" you. While at the same time, preventing the typically infidelity problems that follow standard relationships, and allow each party specifically more freedom.

I'm not sure if I am willing to 100% subscribe to this set idea, but I would also be lying if I said I wouldn't be interested in trying it. Though as I watch more and more statistics say that traditional marriages are not working like the used to, I can't help but wonder if this will be a viable alternative.

Hooray! You made it, I must admit this was a bit of a long one and a bit wordy and a bit personal; otherwise known as a clusterf***. I hope anyone who reads this also finds themselves intrigued by the idea, and that you enjoy this. Feel free to leave some criticism, this quite spontaneous so feel free to point things out, as it can only get better. 

One last thing before I go, as a reward for reading through that whole thing I give you this.

Until we meet again,
Your Humble Scribe,

EDIT: The gif I used for ".... this should explain the latter," was more a representation of how excited I was to share this, I love debating ideology, ethics, do's and don'ts and what not. Just encase there was any confusion.